it surprises me sometimes just how happy i am with my job. there are some bad days.. but most of them stem from the work environment, the colleagues, the communication problems, and simply the differences in culture. but one thing has never failed me, and that has been what i feel when i'm with my students. yes, there are the handful of "bad" kids... the ones that give me grief, the ones that are rude, the ones that don't listen, the ones that no matter what, i'll never be able to truly help. even these kids hold a place in my heart. at the end of the day, it is because of these kids that i want to become a teacher.
im somewhere between a "teacher" and a "friend" to these students. they dont see me that often so i dont have to discipline them, i don't have to give them grades, and i don't have to be mean (even though i choose to. i dont like leaving the discipline up to my coteachers). maybe to everyone at this school i am not considered a "real" teacher. maybe not even to myself, at this point. but sometimes it surprises me how attached i get to these kids, whose names i can't pronounce or don't even know. when i think of them my heart fills up, and when i think of the future i wonder what theirs will be. i wonder if they will ever visit america, will they ever think to contact me if they're ever in new york. and i hope deep down that they will. that i won't become a faded memory in their lives as time goes on, because they won't be a faded memory in mine.
i know that kids back in the states wont be the same way. there is an innocence about these students, a lightheartedness, a different type of relationship they have with their teachers that maybe doesn't exist in middle schools in brooklyn. here, teachers give students a ride home after school. they take their homeroom out to a movie on the weekends. students have their numbers and text them freely in the evening. a teacher in korea, means more than what happens inside the school building. the profession is well-respected (and deservedly so). a teacher can even take away a student's cell phone privileges for an entire month. of course there are some things about the school culture i may not understand and may not even agree with. but as a whole, being in this environment, seeing these kids every day, seeing them remember something i told them weeks before, seeing them make the effort to say something to me in english, and watching their eyes light up when they understand something... this is what i get up for every morning.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Monday, March 8, 2010
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
being korea
According to Wikipedia (and many other, more reputable sources), there are three phases of culture shock.
Honeymoon Phase. "OMG!! Look at the TREES! KOREAN TREES! WOW, even their toilets are different! Check out all the lights! Noraebang, HELL YES!! This place is AWESOME!!!!!!!"
Negotiation Phase. "Ugh. Why can't my teachers just be upfront instead of speaking so ambiguously? How come no one actually PLANS AHEAD in this school? Why can't these scooters follow the damn traffic signals!"
Adjustment Phase. "Ah, you don't know the difference between annyonghi kaseyo and annyonghi kyeseyo? Tsk, tsk, newbie. You gotta get somewhere? I can tell you exactly how to take the bus, what to tell the taxi driver, and no fewer than three landmarks nearby. Dude, you just squat and pee, that's all there is to it..."
We talked about culture shock before I left for Greece, and we talked about culture shock after I arrived in Korea. Whether or not I truly felt it, I'm not sure. Yes, I've experienced all three emotions, but not at strong levels. When I get annoyed at something, it's not simply because it's different from America, but because it's annoying. If it happened to me in America, I would be just as annoyed.
There are supposedly three outcomes after the adjustment phase:
I don't like to categorize myself or generalize my experience, but I can safely say that I am neither a rejector nor an adopter. I am not yet sure if I am a cosmopolitan. However, one thing I've noticed about my relationship with Korea, is that I am extremely patient with it. Where some native teachers would complain about bureaucracy and the constant changes in our contracts, I passively wait for them to sort it out, and go from there. I'll say it again, I passively wait. I don't remember being this passive before, ever in my life (Okay, maybe when I was younger, but definitely not when I was in college). Maybe it's because I am strikingly aware that we are guests in this country, that we have no right to demand anything from it, or to declare that we deserve something simply because we are "better." I sympathize with my co-teachers, who have to deal with us, and have so much requested of them from higher authorities; people who don't know what it takes to control a classroom.
Not that I don't still get annoyed, which I do. But I am actively trying to find a compromise. Instead of bitching and moaning about something, I try to find a way to move forward and still be happy.
When people complain about something authentically "Korean," I think, "this is the way it is, there's no point in arguing about it." Life is life no matter what country you live in, and just because you're "Western" and feel worshipped by your school and the government, doesn't mean that you have the right to say what should and shouldn't happen in a country that's not yours.
Do these opinions make me an adopter? or a cosmopolitan? Either way, I am continuing to feel lucky for this opportunity to immerse myself in a country that is not my own, to see that while some things change from culture to culture, other things are true no matter where you are. Let's revel in our differences, be happy that they exist, and try to value each other for it.
Honeymoon Phase. "OMG!! Look at the TREES! KOREAN TREES! WOW, even their toilets are different! Check out all the lights! Noraebang, HELL YES!! This place is AWESOME!!!!!!!"
Negotiation Phase. "Ugh. Why can't my teachers just be upfront instead of speaking so ambiguously? How come no one actually PLANS AHEAD in this school? Why can't these scooters follow the damn traffic signals!"
Adjustment Phase. "Ah, you don't know the difference between annyonghi kaseyo and annyonghi kyeseyo? Tsk, tsk, newbie. You gotta get somewhere? I can tell you exactly how to take the bus, what to tell the taxi driver, and no fewer than three landmarks nearby. Dude, you just squat and pee, that's all there is to it..."
We talked about culture shock before I left for Greece, and we talked about culture shock after I arrived in Korea. Whether or not I truly felt it, I'm not sure. Yes, I've experienced all three emotions, but not at strong levels. When I get annoyed at something, it's not simply because it's different from America, but because it's annoying. If it happened to me in America, I would be just as annoyed.
There are supposedly three outcomes after the adjustment phase:
- "Some people find it impossible to accept the foreign culture and integrate. They isolate themselves from the host country's environment, which they come to perceive as hostile, withdraw into a ghetto and see return to their own culture as the only way out. These Rejectors also have the greatest problems re-integrating back home after return. Approximately 60% of expatriates behave in this way."
- "Some people integrate fully and take on all parts of the host culture while losing their original identity. They normally remain in the host country forever. Approximately 10% of expatriates belong to this group of Adopters."
- "Some people manage to adapt the aspects of the host culture they see as positive, while keeping some of their own and creating their unique blend. They have no major problems returning home or relocating elsewhere. Approximately 30% of expatriates are these so-called Cosmopolitans."
I don't like to categorize myself or generalize my experience, but I can safely say that I am neither a rejector nor an adopter. I am not yet sure if I am a cosmopolitan. However, one thing I've noticed about my relationship with Korea, is that I am extremely patient with it. Where some native teachers would complain about bureaucracy and the constant changes in our contracts, I passively wait for them to sort it out, and go from there. I'll say it again, I passively wait. I don't remember being this passive before, ever in my life (Okay, maybe when I was younger, but definitely not when I was in college). Maybe it's because I am strikingly aware that we are guests in this country, that we have no right to demand anything from it, or to declare that we deserve something simply because we are "better." I sympathize with my co-teachers, who have to deal with us, and have so much requested of them from higher authorities; people who don't know what it takes to control a classroom.
Not that I don't still get annoyed, which I do. But I am actively trying to find a compromise. Instead of bitching and moaning about something, I try to find a way to move forward and still be happy.
When people complain about something authentically "Korean," I think, "this is the way it is, there's no point in arguing about it." Life is life no matter what country you live in, and just because you're "Western" and feel worshipped by your school and the government, doesn't mean that you have the right to say what should and shouldn't happen in a country that's not yours.
Do these opinions make me an adopter? or a cosmopolitan? Either way, I am continuing to feel lucky for this opportunity to immerse myself in a country that is not my own, to see that while some things change from culture to culture, other things are true no matter where you are. Let's revel in our differences, be happy that they exist, and try to value each other for it.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
vacation
Currently, school's out for winter vacation. The first few weeks of this vacation I will be required to come to school - even teach a class - and desk-warm for the whole day. I don't mind this because I'm getting paid for this time, it's in my contract, and it also gives me a chance to catch up on my work and lesson planning.
What's fun about this vacation is the opportunity it gives me to really interact with my students. There are only six students in my class (three of which I've never taught before), which makes it easier for me to actually remember names. I've been really enjoying my Taekwondo classes because the students there are fun and friendly (again, some I have never spent time with in a classroom). They invite me to church, or to lunch at their house. Last week I took my class on a scavenger hunt at the science museum and we went out to get Kimbap afterwards. Sunday I went snowboarding with my Taekwondo instructor and another student. It sucks that I have to work on vacation but these little things make up for it!!
On another note, it's so dry and cold here that the skin on my hands are actually cracking and starting to bleed in some places. It hurts!! =(
What's fun about this vacation is the opportunity it gives me to really interact with my students. There are only six students in my class (three of which I've never taught before), which makes it easier for me to actually remember names. I've been really enjoying my Taekwondo classes because the students there are fun and friendly (again, some I have never spent time with in a classroom). They invite me to church, or to lunch at their house. Last week I took my class on a scavenger hunt at the science museum and we went out to get Kimbap afterwards. Sunday I went snowboarding with my Taekwondo instructor and another student. It sucks that I have to work on vacation but these little things make up for it!!
On another note, it's so dry and cold here that the skin on my hands are actually cracking and starting to bleed in some places. It hurts!! =(
Monday, November 16, 2009
I'm a horrible blogger.
I used to be much better about blogging. Apologies for my lack of updates.
Not exactly sure what I should be updating about... if you're my close friend and/or if you have Facebook, you probably already know how I've been doing. So instead, I'll just do some random fun facts about me/Korea for those too lazy to stalk me.
1. I've been learning Korean. I think I'm learning a lot for a beginner... its honestly easier for me because I have a background in speaking an Asian language.. and Korean is very close to Chinese, so the prounciation is easier. One thing I've been able to enjoy a lot here is the sense of anonymity. Because I am Asian, I can blend in pretty well and if I'm walking around with headphones I don't get too many gawkers or stares.. (unless my students see me, in which case I'll know they go to my school and I can wave hello) I've been mistaken for a Korean on multiple occasions but it doesn't bother me as it gives me an opportunity to practice my Korean.
2. The Daejeon Office of Education is offering all Native English Teachers a chance to learn Taekwondo, so I've signed up!! I'm pretty excited for it but I haven't started classes yet. The one negative thing about it is that the studio is very close to my house, and therefore, very close to my school. The son of the owner is actually one of my students. I'm not sure how many students at my school take Taekwondo, but I'm sure it will be interesting for them to see me make a fool out of myself...
3. I'm going on a Temple Stay this coming weekend. I'm pretty excited about it so maybe afterwards I'll have the time/concentration to write a blogpost about the experience. Basically a temple stay is when you visit a Buddhist temple and spend a night there with the monks. You get to see how they live, and participate in meditation activities (some in the wee hours of the morning...) and take some time to think spiritually about your life.
4. School is going well... I'm getting the hang of working with all my teachers, fitting in to the culture of the school(s), and planning lessons without procrastinating. There are still the random spontaneous schedule changes or lack of communication/info... but I try to just go with it and take all things in stride.
5. One random fact about Korea that I found very interesting and cool... is the many ways that it's environmentally friendly. I just learned about what composting was about a few months before I left, but they do that here, everywhere. You're required to separate your garbage, aside from simply the recycling, you also separate your food trash. There is a separate bucket for that outside each building and they collect it in order to make feed for livestock in farms or something (don't quote me on that). Also, in most grocery stores and also large shopping markets, they charge you for plastic bags and they're also very stingy with it... it encourages you to bring your own or simply not use a bag.
Not exactly sure what I should be updating about... if you're my close friend and/or if you have Facebook, you probably already know how I've been doing. So instead, I'll just do some random fun facts about me/Korea for those too lazy to stalk me.
1. I've been learning Korean. I think I'm learning a lot for a beginner... its honestly easier for me because I have a background in speaking an Asian language.. and Korean is very close to Chinese, so the prounciation is easier. One thing I've been able to enjoy a lot here is the sense of anonymity. Because I am Asian, I can blend in pretty well and if I'm walking around with headphones I don't get too many gawkers or stares.. (unless my students see me, in which case I'll know they go to my school and I can wave hello) I've been mistaken for a Korean on multiple occasions but it doesn't bother me as it gives me an opportunity to practice my Korean.
2. The Daejeon Office of Education is offering all Native English Teachers a chance to learn Taekwondo, so I've signed up!! I'm pretty excited for it but I haven't started classes yet. The one negative thing about it is that the studio is very close to my house, and therefore, very close to my school. The son of the owner is actually one of my students. I'm not sure how many students at my school take Taekwondo, but I'm sure it will be interesting for them to see me make a fool out of myself...
3. I'm going on a Temple Stay this coming weekend. I'm pretty excited about it so maybe afterwards I'll have the time/concentration to write a blogpost about the experience. Basically a temple stay is when you visit a Buddhist temple and spend a night there with the monks. You get to see how they live, and participate in meditation activities (some in the wee hours of the morning...) and take some time to think spiritually about your life.
4. School is going well... I'm getting the hang of working with all my teachers, fitting in to the culture of the school(s), and planning lessons without procrastinating. There are still the random spontaneous schedule changes or lack of communication/info... but I try to just go with it and take all things in stride.
5. One random fact about Korea that I found very interesting and cool... is the many ways that it's environmentally friendly. I just learned about what composting was about a few months before I left, but they do that here, everywhere. You're required to separate your garbage, aside from simply the recycling, you also separate your food trash. There is a separate bucket for that outside each building and they collect it in order to make feed for livestock in farms or something (don't quote me on that). Also, in most grocery stores and also large shopping markets, they charge you for plastic bags and they're also very stingy with it... it encourages you to bring your own or simply not use a bag.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Seoul (10.02-10.04)
A little belated, I apologize. But here is my update on my trip to Seoul. =)
It was an amazing time - Seoul is huge and beautiful and crowded and packed full of foreigners. Actually, when I first arrived at the station, walking out onto the street I got so excited because it was such a bustling city... it reminded me of home! Sometimes when I've been away from a city for a while, seeing crowded sidewalks and people rushing to get to where they need to go makes me nostalgic. Not that Daejeon isn't a city; it's crowded here as well and congestion is a nightmare... maybe it was just the fact that I was in Seoul that also got me excited. However, by the end of my weekend I was extremely happy that I did NOT live in Seoul and I was very excited to get back to home sweet Daejeon.
(Friday)
We arrived in Seoul at around 5pm... had just enough time to get to my hostel in Hongdae, drop off my stuff, and help my two friends find a motel to stay in. We tried to do some exploring and check out this electronics market, but by the time we got there it was already closing, so we headed back to Hongdae for some dinner. Hongdae is an area by Hongdik University (Hongdik Daehakgyo) that has a ton of bars and clubs. That night we went to a bar and then a club called nb2 (or noise basement, I'm pretty sure..). It was fun but the club was extremely packed and I did not enjoy getting pushed around so much.
(Saturday)
The next day, we woke up, grabbed some breakfast/lunch, and headed to Insadong to see the National Palace (Gyeongbukgung). Because it was Chuseok, admission to t
he palace and the museums inside were free. The palace was huge and had a backdrop of some pretty hills... after walking in, it was like stepping outside of Seoul and back in time. We took some photos with guards, explored/played, and visited the Folk Museum (also for free). Apparently there was a pretty lake somewhere on the grounds, but we missed it. =(
After that, we went to the open market in Insadong. They sold a lot of crafts and souvenir items there, I was tempted to buy a lot but I knew I would have tons of time to buy things for my friends and family back home. We walked a lot at this time: from Insadong all the way south toward Myeongdong and Namdaemun Market (I know this means nothing to you if you don't know Seoul, but trust me: it's a bit of a walk). We passed this bridge with a small stream under it, with a stone path, benches to sit on, and rocks to climb. This must've been my favorite place in Seoul. It was so random, I didn't expect to see it in such a busy and crowded city... it's times like this - when out of nowhere you see something that's a part of nature exist somewhere you never expected it to, and to be able to peacefully step away from the sound of horns honking and foreign languages and the footsteps of millions of people heading this way and that, and instead listen to the sound of flowing water... okay I'm getting philosophical on you, so I'll stop!
Myeongdong and Namdaemun Market is a shopper's paradise. Especially a bargain shopper. Especially a bargain shopper who does not mind buying fake designer goods at dirt cheap prices. There is just so much around you. The area is a pedestrian strip, with many reputable clothing stores around (i.e. Forever 21 - biggest one I have ever seen and the only one in Korea... needless to say, I will be back there soon), and then vendors with their stands on the street selling watches, purses, jewelry, hair clips, FOOD, etc... it's definitely a stop on everyone's list when they visit Seoul.
Myeongdong
Following this, we met up with some friends in Itaewon - the "foreigner" district with tons of international cuisine. We went to a Thai restaurant and my friend Chriselle got to take a picture with a famous actor who owned the restaurant (first thing every Korean told me when I mentioned his name.. "Did you know he's gay?!".. still a taboo in Korea but awesome that a celebrity came out and is still famous). Itaewon is great if you're missing home.. but the minute I stepped out of the subway system it was like I wasn't in Korea anymore. There were foreigners everywhere. I love traveling and I love meeting people from all over the world, but for me, living in Korea feels different. I don't want to be around foreigners all the time. I want to meet Koreans, make lasting friendships, share in their culture. So I guess Itaewon wasn't my favorite stop in Seoul.
That night I was planning on going up to Namsan Tower but it ended up raining when we got there... so that was out. Instead we walked around an empty Myeongdong (completely different without all the stands and crowds at night), and found a shady cafe/bar to chill at for a while. Then back to Hongdae where I got to see some old orientation buddies before I called it a night.
(Sunday)
Our train was scheduled to leave in the evening on Sunday, so we had plenty of time to explore all the outdoor markets. Tried hitting up Dongdaemun but it was half closed since it was the Sunday after Chuseok... Myeongdong and Namdaemun though were open and busy as usual so I spent my afternoon haggling with my two friends for cheaper prices and cutting deals with the shopkeepers. Purchases of the day: a bag and sweater.
All in all, my trip to Seoul was great. I got to see some old friends from Orientation, which was all I really wanted to do. I'm looking forward to going back for more shopping, hanging out, and hopefully visiting some old friends from the US who are living there now.
It was an amazing time - Seoul is huge and beautiful and crowded and packed full of foreigners. Actually, when I first arrived at the station, walking out onto the street I got so excited because it was such a bustling city... it reminded me of home! Sometimes when I've been away from a city for a while, seeing crowded sidewalks and people rushing to get to where they need to go makes me nostalgic. Not that Daejeon isn't a city; it's crowded here as well and congestion is a nightmare... maybe it was just the fact that I was in Seoul that also got me excited. However, by the end of my weekend I was extremely happy that I did NOT live in Seoul and I was very excited to get back to home sweet Daejeon.
(Friday)
We arrived in Seoul at around 5pm... had just enough time to get to my hostel in Hongdae, drop off my stuff, and help my two friends find a motel to stay in. We tried to do some exploring and check out this electronics market, but by the time we got there it was already closing, so we headed back to Hongdae for some dinner. Hongdae is an area by Hongdik University (Hongdik Daehakgyo) that has a ton of bars and clubs. That night we went to a bar and then a club called nb2 (or noise basement, I'm pretty sure..). It was fun but the club was extremely packed and I did not enjoy getting pushed around so much.
(Saturday)
he palace and the museums inside were free. The palace was huge and had a backdrop of some pretty hills... after walking in, it was like stepping outside of Seoul and back in time. We took some photos with guards, explored/played, and visited the Folk Museum (also for free). Apparently there was a pretty lake somewhere on the grounds, but we missed it. =(After that, we went to the open market in Insadong. They sold a lot of crafts and souvenir items there, I was tempted to buy a lot but I knew I would have tons of time to buy things for my friends and family back home. We walked a lot at this time: from Insadong all the way south toward Myeongdong and Namdaemun Market (I know this means nothing to you if you don't know Seoul, but trust me: it's a bit of a walk). We passed this bridge with a small stream under it, with a stone path, benches to sit on, and rocks to climb. This must've been my favorite place in Seoul. It was so random, I didn't expect to see it in such a busy and crowded city... it's times like this - when out of nowhere you see something that's a part of nature exist somewhere you never expected it to, and to be able to peacefully step away from the sound of horns honking and foreign languages and the footsteps of millions of people heading this way and that, and instead listen to the sound of flowing water... okay I'm getting philosophical on you, so I'll stop!
Myeongdong and Namdaemun Market is a shopper's paradise. Especially a bargain shopper. Especially a bargain shopper who does not mind buying fake designer goods at dirt cheap prices. There is just so much around you. The area is a pedestrian strip, with many reputable clothing stores around (i.e. Forever 21 - biggest one I have ever seen and the only one in Korea... needless to say, I will be back there soon), and then vendors with their stands on the street selling watches, purses, jewelry, hair clips, FOOD, etc... it's definitely a stop on everyone's list when they visit Seoul.
Myeongdong
Following this, we met up with some friends in Itaewon - the "foreigner" district with tons of international cuisine. We went to a Thai restaurant and my friend Chriselle got to take a picture with a famous actor who owned the restaurant (first thing every Korean told me when I mentioned his name.. "Did you know he's gay?!".. still a taboo in Korea but awesome that a celebrity came out and is still famous). Itaewon is great if you're missing home.. but the minute I stepped out of the subway system it was like I wasn't in Korea anymore. There were foreigners everywhere. I love traveling and I love meeting people from all over the world, but for me, living in Korea feels different. I don't want to be around foreigners all the time. I want to meet Koreans, make lasting friendships, share in their culture. So I guess Itaewon wasn't my favorite stop in Seoul.
That night I was planning on going up to Namsan Tower but it ended up raining when we got there... so that was out. Instead we walked around an empty Myeongdong (completely different without all the stands and crowds at night), and found a shady cafe/bar to chill at for a while. Then back to Hongdae where I got to see some old orientation buddies before I called it a night.
(Sunday)
Our train was scheduled to leave in the evening on Sunday, so we had plenty of time to explore all the outdoor markets. Tried hitting up Dongdaemun but it was half closed since it was the Sunday after Chuseok... Myeongdong and Namdaemun though were open and busy as usual so I spent my afternoon haggling with my two friends for cheaper prices and cutting deals with the shopkeepers. Purchases of the day: a bag and sweater.
All in all, my trip to Seoul was great. I got to see some old friends from Orientation, which was all I really wanted to do. I'm looking forward to going back for more shopping, hanging out, and hopefully visiting some old friends from the US who are living there now.
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